I just need to pour this out there somewhere. I just turned 19 yesterday. It doesn’t feel different but I’m reflecting on year 18 a lot. It was honestly a whirlwind of a year and I have so many mixed feelings about it. I think this was the year that knocked me on my ass the most, I experienced the most growing pains, I changed majors, and I hit a lot of rough patches. At the same time though, I met my half sister, my friendships flourished where they were supposed to and deteriorated where the needed to, I learned a lot about myself through my growth. 18 was truly a bitter sweet year for me and I’m honestly going to miss it in a way.
I’m two months in to 19. It hasn’t gotten easier. Month one I thought was a beautiful start. I met a great guy that is already no longer in the picture (and I am still dealing with this bitterness) , I was loving my job(I still do though I’m tired) and loving life(don’t get me wrong, i still do, it just hasn’t felt like I’ve been in control lately). Month two has proven to be shakier. I have my real adult 40 hour a week job, where sometimes older people call me sweetie/honey/etc.. It reminds me I’m still young and maturing. I’ve started coursework for my major. It’s overwhelming but I’m excited for what the future holds. I bought a car, and in turn now have a car payment. I’m learning the importance of not overloading myself while still continuing to do it anyways. I find comfort in these growing pains.
Four months into 19. The same guy mentioned above has found his way back into my life in the last couple weeks. It’s been exciting but nervous. That’s how the past 4 months have felt as a whole. I’ve finally settled into my job, to which I’ve fallen in love with more than I’ve imagined. I’m loving my classes, even the ones I don’t like. I am loving the path I am on now. I am proud of myself: past, present and future.
I’ve been in a “we almost dated, but nah” relationship so many damn times. Dating has become such an abstract concept to me. There’s like 10 different levels of dating before you’re actually dating. It’s so confusing I need to nap
I just need to pour this out there somewhere. I just turned 19 yesterday. It doesn’t feel different but I’m reflecting on year 18 a lot. It was honestly a whirlwind of a year and I have so many mixed feelings about it. I think this was the year that knocked me on my ass the most, I experienced the most growing pains, I changed majors, and I hit a lot of rough patches. At the same time though, I met my half sister, my friendships flourished where they were supposed to and deteriorated where the needed to, I learned a lot about myself through my growth. 18 was truly a bitter sweet year for me and I’m honestly going to miss it in a way.
I’m two months in to 19. It hasn’t gotten easier. Month one I thought was a beautiful start. I met a great guy that is already no longer in the picture (and I am still dealing with this bitterness) , I was loving my job(I still do though I’m tired) and loving life(don’t get me wrong, i still do, it just hasn’t felt like I’ve been in control lately). Month two has proven to be shakier. I have my real adult 40 hour a week job, where sometimes older people call me sweetie/honey/etc.. It reminds me I’m still young and maturing. I’ve started coursework for my major. It’s overwhelming but I’m excited for what the future holds. I bought a car, and in turn now have a car payment. I’m learning the importance of not overloading myself while still continuing to do it anyways. I find comfort in these growing pains.
